Charlie: You the man.
Jack: No, I'm the snowman.
David: Yeah, where's our lawyer?
Big Bob: Oh, I think we want to keep these proceedings as pleasant as possible.
Wine Colored Tuxedo: I said there are no seats left sir, at any price.
Dr. Gonzo: Fuck seats! We're friends of Debbie's. I used to romp with her.
Anthony 'Hub' Hubbard: You will go to prison.
Agent Frank Haddad: You know what happens to women in prison?
Elise Kraft: Mmmmm... yummm.
Dedee Truitt: Lucia and Carl had their baby. You can imagine the pick of that litter. It was the kind of kid that if you played with it too much after a feeding, you threw up.
Kevin: A knight proves his worthiness by his deeds.
Commissioner James 'Jim' Gordon: Come on, people! A guy in a wierd suit with two polar bears can't be too hard to spot. (00:30:45)
Dorian: I'd like to be the father-to-be.
Sally: You can't be the father and the brother! That's the kind of thing that messes kids up.
Henry: I'm going to row back there and see if he will shoot you. Or me. It's fine either way.
Victor Bukowski: Even if I could pretend that you never left me... I couldn't pretend that I don't love her.
Kurt Dussander: Boy, be careful. You play with fire.
Jason: I guess he's still in the slammer.
Claudia: In the slammer?
Jason: Yeah, the sculptor across the way beat up his wife last night.
Claudia: You're kidding.
Antonio: Jason sicced the cops on him.
Claudia: Oh, so this isn't just cheap thrills. It's in the public interest.
Jason: Call me citizen voyeur.
Claudia: So, if he gonna come after you?
Jason: No, I don't think so. He doesn't know I called the cops, and I didn't give my name to 911.
Kevin Dunne: Don't give me that wounded look. You haven't got the face for it.
Jan Schlichtmann: So what are you saying? You want to get out now and cut our losses, you want to get out now and throw away...? What was it?
James Gordon: 1.4 million dollars.
Jan Schlichtmann: Well, I don't know what to tell you because there's things I need to prove and I can't do that not spending money.
James Gordon: We have to go see uncle Pete.
Hilary: If you think being an ordinary person is any easier than being an extraordinary one, you're wrong.
Sam: Kelly Van Ryan is accusing me of rape.
Kenneth Bowden: Kelly Van Ryan? As in Sandra Van Ryan?
Sam: As in, I'm fucked.
Lord Robert: Marry me.
Elizabeth: On a night such as this, could any woman say no?
Lord Robert: On a night such as this, could a queen say no?
Elizabeth: Does not a queen sit under the same stars as any other woman?
Sen. Jay Billington Bulworth: All we need is a voluntary, free-spirited, open-ended program of procreative racial deconstruction. Everybody just gotta keep fuckin' everybody 'til they're all the same color.
Mari Hoff: Ah, your not the famous phone bill, are ya?
Finn: If this isn't love, I don't think I can handle the real thing.