Frau Farbissina: Remember when we froze your semen? You said that if it looked like you weren't coming back we should try to make you a son so that a part of you could live forever?
Dr. Evil: Oh, sure.
Frau Farbissina: Well, after a couple of years, we got a little impatient. Dr. Evil, I want you to meet your son.
Dr. Evil: My son?
Frau Farbissina: Ja. SCOTT!
[Poe is looking out of the back of the plane at the DEA agent's car tethered to it, flapping about.]
Cameron Poe: On any other day, that might seem strange.
Castor Troy: You'll be seeing a lot of changes around here. Papa's got a brand new bag.
The Lady Chablis: Stop telling me what to do. I want to propose a toast. "From my top to your bottom. From your bottom to my top. From my middle to your middle. Be good John and I just might give you a little.
Rudy Baylor: Sworn in by a fool and vouched for by a scoundrel. I'm a lawyer at last.
James Russell: I want some answers.
Franklin Hatchett: Hey man, me and Guy just down here, checkin' out some fly rides, and mackin' some hos and chillin'.
James Russell: Imagine that. It's like a G-Dog on a fly tip. Flossin' wit da posse. Cuttin' in da crib. what THE fuck does that mean?
Franklin Hatchett: Man, I don't wanna have to beat yo ass, but I will beat yo ass.
Moe Tilden: That cupcake makes a mess and we got a case again.
Charlie Barret: I'm going to give you an opportunity: get out of this. Now. Before it gets so fucked up nobody could ever recover.
Alex: Excuse me for being a good citizen.
Max Cherry: I'll bet, besides maybe an afro, you look exactly how you did at 29.
Jackie Brown: Well, my ass ain't the same.
Max Cherry: Bigger?
Jackie Brown: Yeah.
Max Cherry: Ain't nothin' wrong with that.
Poison Ivy: I must confess, the combination of heroic derring-do and anatomically-correct rubber suit puts fire in a girl's lips.
Batman: Why do all the gorgeous ones have to be homicidal maniacs? Is it me?
Debi Newberry: You're a psychopath.
Martin Blank: No, no. Psychopaths kill for no reason. I kill for money. It's a job... That didn't come out right.
Wallace: Sorry I get a little bit insensitive, but I'm a hitman.
Dianne Wainford: What sort of policeman are you?
Alex Cross: I'm a forensic psychologist. It's a fancy way of saying I'm a guy who walks into a room like that and determines the hows and whys.
Detective Harlan Regis: I think the president's gonna become an international suspect.
Seth Frank: There's one thing I forgot to tell you. I live alone.
Jerry Fletcher: A good conspiracy is unprovable. I mean, if you can prove it, it means they screwed up somewhere along the line.
Declan Mulqueen: Preston, what about letting me have a gun?
Preston: Are you crazy? If the right people knew I was letting you walk around without cuffs, I'd have forced retirement. (01:08:45)
Nick Beam: You don't say "sorry" when you shoot somebody. You can say "sorry" when you step on someone's toe, or accidentally break their glasses, or when you fart while they're eating. you don't SAY you'RE sorry when you shoot someone.