Best comedy movie quotes of 1995

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Movie Quote Quiz
Bad Boys picture

Marcus Burnett: You see what happens when you go off without me? You get into shit.
Mike Lowrey: Oh please, like shit don't happen when you're there.
Marcus Burnett: That - that ain't the point.

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Fallen Angels picture

He Zhiwu: They say that love can change a man. I start to find myself looking better and more charming, and suddenly I discover that I'm turning blonde.

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Welcome to the Dollhouse picture

Ralphie: You think you're hot shit, but you're really just cold diarrhea.

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Get Shorty picture

Chili Palmer: Harry, look at me. You're trying to tell me you fucked up without sounding stupid, and that's hard to do.

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Underground picture

Ivan: Bila jednom jedna zemlja. Once upon a time... there was a country.

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Operation Dumbo Drop picture

Capt. T.C. Doyle: You slept with the wife of General "Kill-'em-all-and-let-God-sort-them-out" Richardson?
David Poole: I thought it was his daughter.
Capt. T.C. Doyle: Oh yeah, he would've been fine with that.

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Father of the Bride Part II picture

George Banks: Mr Habeeb, this is not a piece of land. This is my home and I'm gonna be a father again and I don't want to bring my baby home to a condo on the beach! I wanna drive down that street and I wanna pull into this driveway and I wanna honk my horn.

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Canadian Bacon picture

Kabral: The black guy always dies. Think about it, man. Unforgiven. Alien. Rocky IV. The Shining.
Roy: Star Trek II. Forrest Gump. Witness.
Bud: Annie Hall. Not Annie Hall.
Roy: No, Night of the Living Dead.
Bud: That's the one!
Kabral: And what about that brother in Jurassic Park, man?
Bud: There were two black guys who died in that one. That was a twofer. You must be really pissed off at that one.

Bishop73

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Grumpier Old Men picture

Maria: Ox.
Max: Nag.

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Waiting to Exhale picture

Bernadine Harris: The worst thing is that he made me move out here where my children are in school with only one other black kid so they won't be improperly influenced. Well, guess what John, YOU'RE the motherfuckin' improper influence! Get your shit! Get your shit! And, get out.

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Wallace & Gromit: A Close Shave picture

Wendolene Ramsbottom: He's malfunctioning.
Wallace: Mal what?
Wendolene Ramsbottom: Malfunctioning. Preston is a cyberdog.
Wallace: Cyber what?
Wendolene Ramsbottom: A robot. Daddy created him for good, but he's turned out evil.

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Houseguest picture

Ron Timmerman: I wash my balls religiously. I like 'em so clean you can just feel every dimple.
Kevin Franklin: Thank you for sharing that.
Ron: The cleaner the ball, the better the play. Especially when you pull out that wood. The quicker you get it into the hole with the least amount of strokes, the better, right?
Kevin: Are you trying to tell me something?
Ron: Let me wash your balls.

Bishop73

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Something to Talk About picture

Grace: Emma Rae, I have a cookbook to put out, and a daughter to raise, and the God damn winter Grand Prix. And I just don't have time for the nervous breakdown I deserve, so please, don't ask me to stop and think.

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Tommy Boy picture

Tommy: You know a lot of people go to college for seven years.
Richard: I know. They're called doctors.

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To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar picture

Vida Boheme: I think tomorrow is a "Say Something" hat day.

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Boys on the Side picture

Elaine: I do the best I can, honey. I know it's not enough, and I'm sorry. But that's what you get in life, you know? You get whoever you end up with. Whoever is willing to stick by you, and fight for you, when everyone else is gone. And it ain't always who you expect. But you just have to make do.

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It Takes Two picture

Diane Barrows: It was there, I know it, that can't-eat, can't-sleep, reach-for-the-stars, over - the-fence, World Series kind of stuff.

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Billy Madison picture

High School Principal: Mr. Madison, what you've just said, is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response, were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
Billy Madison: OK, a simple "wrong" would have done just fine.

Bishop73

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While You Were Sleeping picture

Lucy: You give up your seat every day in the train.
Peter: Well... But that's not heroic.
Lucy: It is to the person who sits in it.

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To Die for picture

Suzanne Stone Maretto: You're not anybody in America unless you're on TV. On TV is where we learn about who we really are. Because what's the point of doing anything worthwhile if nobody's watching? And if people are watching, it makes you a better person.

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