Best comedy movie quotes of 1993

Nancy Archer: Missed me?
Harry Archer: I don't suppose you want to hear my side of this?

[Addressing a roomful of Japanese businessmen.]
President Benson: It seems like only yesterday I was strafing so many of your homes. Yet here I am today, begging you not to make such good cars.

Laura Jackson: What a stupid idiot.
Jed Clampett: Did you say something, ma'am?
Laura Jackson: What a stupendous intellect.
Jethro: That's cause I "grad-ge-ated" the sixth grade, ma'am. Only took three years.

April O'Neill: This is absolutely the worst rescue I have ever had.

Max Goldman: If I had known I would be doing a nude scene, I'd have asked for another million.

Josh Waitzkin: You've lost, you just don't know it yet.

James Wright: How many Beatles are there?
Kyle Davidson: Three... and Ringo.

Mikey Ubriacco: Stop brushing her, Julie. She already looks like a Q-tip.
Julie Ubriacco: Your dog smells like a diaper.
Mikey Ubriacco: Does not.
Julie Ubriacco: Diaper dog! Diaper dog.
Mikey Ubriacco: Q-tip head dog.
Julie Ubriacco: Stinky dog.
Mikey Ubriacco: Bald-butted dog.

Michael Chapman: I turned Angela from a pickpocket into a star into a shoplifter.

Hope Burnford: Hungry?
Sassy: No.
Hope Burnford: But it's shrimp. You like shrimp.
Sassy: Yeah, well, I've still got those four pesky ounces still hanging on from last Christmas.

Doug Ireland: Nothing's impossible Albert. Impossible just takes a couple extra phone calls.

Joon: Having a Boo Radley moment, are we?

Athletic Cone: I have learned much from watching the Garthok battle. It has weaknesses. I believe I can take it.
Beldar Conehead: Uh-huh. And let me know when Elvis gets here.

Iggy: All right, Kids, come in here and Clean up Yer Bloody Room! I know well, cuz I'm 37, and don't make Me beat You with Leg of Mine that no longer Works cuz I'll do it.

Sister Mary Robert: The only thing the chef knows how to cook is German sausage.
Sister Mary Lazarus: Day after day, liverwurst, bratwurst, beerwurst.
Sister Mary Patrick: It's the "worst."

Regina: If you want your dog back, call my lawyer.

Bell: You're gonna have to find a more constructive way to show your frustration.
Miller: Okay. Well fuck you. How's that for constructive?
Bell: Great. Now go to time out, mister.
Swan: We warned you.
Miller: Man, you guys are weird.

Athos: Only a fool would try and arrest us twice in one day.
Guard: You're under arrest.
Porthos/Aramis: A fool.
Guard: Are you coming peacefully or do you intend to resist?
Porthos: Oh, don't be so stupid, of course we intend to resist. Just give us a moment.

Kay Curley: It's a terrible shock.
Dessie Curley: What is?
Kay Curley: Being married for 25 years, and finding out your husband's a prick.

Alex: Fuck you, Lucky Charms.

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