John Hammond: All major theme parks have had delays. When they opened Disneyland in 1956, nothing worked, nothing.
Ian Malcolm: But, John, if the Pirates of the Caribbean breaks down, the pirates don't eat the tourists.
Josef Grul: Hey, Jamaica! Watch out for Number Twelve turn. Scary, ja?
Derice Bannock: What's his problem?
Irv: He's Josef Grul. He's one of the best drivers in the world.
Yul Brenner: Yeah, he's one of the biggest assholes in the world, too.
Luigi: Do you eat?
Princess Daisy: Yes.
Luigi: Dinner?
Princess Daisy: Yes.
Luigi: Tonight?
Eric Qualen: Kill a few people, they call you a murderer. Kill a million and you're a conqueror.
Jack Slater: Sir, are you a henchman?
Benedict: No, I only go as far as lackey.
Johnny: Kwantsu, Dudes.
The King: We've even invented something to remove tartar off your teeth... unfortunately, the enamel goes right along with it.
Larry Wilson: I was not the one who was out CONGA-DANCING all night, huh.