Jason Williamson: You were in the marines?
Hollywood Montrose: Yes they were looking for a few good men and... so was I.
Deak: Do you have any idea what we are gonna do to you, if we find one itty, bitty scratch on 'em?
Shep Ramsey: Let me guess. You're gonna pound my face. Break every bone in my body. Then you're gonna drag me across a gravel road and feed my remains to a warthog. Is that about right?
Deak: What are you nuts? This is the '90s. We're gonna sue you.
Driver: If there's no room at the Hotel Genius, I'll take a room at the Hotel Imbecile.
Working on Same Painting: Sorry, I'm late.
Having a Breakthrough Day: That's okay, time doesn't exist.
Ethan O'Fallon: Now look, Hallie, you can ask for toys, parakeets, hair care products, I don't care. But you may not ask for anything to do with interpersonal relationships! Got it? This is Santa Claus, not Dear Abby.
Johnny: Straight up, fact.
Rosalie: Hey, you got the elevator fixed, Frankie.
Frank: Hey, not for you, Rosie. There's still a one-ton load limit.
Harris: If confusion about your love life is ruining your day, I think it's good to go over to your best friend's house and ruin her day too.
Louison: One must always forgive.
Julie Clapet: Depends. It's not always possible.
Louison: Don't say that. No one is entirely evil. It's circumstance. Or they don't realise the wrong.
Green Bay Football Coach: Which would you put first, coach? Family or football?
Green Bay Football Coach: Are you kidding? Football's my life.
Al: Come on, what do I gotta do?
Patricia: You could crawl through broken glass on your hands and knees with a sign on your back that says asshole. That might get you in the door.
Goddard Bolt: I did it! I did it.
A man sitting/leaning back, on a building.: Where did he do it? Not here, I hope.
Nick Fifer: I don't know how our marriage lasted.
Deborah Fifer: Mutual death wish.