Kathy: I wanted vanilla twist.
Bob Woodward: Who's Charles Colson?
Harry Rosenfeld: Sit down. You know I'm glad you asked me that question. The reason I'm glad you asked me is because if you had asked Simons or Bradlee they woulda said, "You know we're gonna have to fire this schmuck at once because he's so dumb."
Hellsgate rancher: They call this country Hell's Gate. When my dad came in here, it was nothing but a bunch of savage Indians. And Jesuits. Old Thomas Jefferson said that he was a warrior so his son could be a farmer, so his son could be a poet. And I raise cattle so my son can be a merchant, so his son can move to Newport, Rhode Island and buy a sailboat and never see one of these bastard-ass sons of bitching mountains again.
Si: Who was Thomas Jefferson?
Hellsgate rancher: A guy back east.
Dan: Look, Bendix made a stew. I had no idea there was a foot in it.
Woody Guthrie: This land is your land/This land is my land/From California to the New York Island/From the Redwood forests to the Gulf Stream waters/This land was made for you and me.
Fred Wilson: I know the day, the hour you completed your toilet training.
Sherlock Holmes: No, Watson! The Queen wouldn't like it.
Arthur Adamson: Isn't it touching how a perfect murder has kept our friendship alive all these years.
Tim: Sid what do you know about romance?
Sid: Nothing, I'm married.
Max Schumacher: She does have one script in which I kill myself: An adapted for television version of "Anna Karenina", where she's Count Vronsky and I'm Anna.
Sybil Dorsett: Who dat?
Richard J. Loomis: Who dat who say who dat?
Sybil Dorsett: Who dat who say who dat who say who dat?
Mycroft Holmes: Ah Jenkins, we shall need a cab.
Dr. Abner Perry: You cannot mesmerise me! I'm British.
Jason Smith: How come you can speak Indian?
Zachariah Coop: Well, my mother was the daughter of a Cherokee chief.
Jason Smith: Really?
Zachariah Coop: Yeah.
Jason Smith: What was she like?
Zachariah Coop: I don't really remember because she died two years before I was born.
Nicole Dressler: Oh, what is it all about?
Dr. Jonathan Chamberlain: I'd say a slight case of, uh...food poisoning.
Nicole Dressler: I think either you're a lousy doctor or a lousy liar.
Narrator: And when the sun went down... there was an eerie, ghostly appearance to this town.
Annabel: Max, you big hamburger.
Sam Clayton: I ain't getting no younger. Time just goes by and then... then one day... one day you just get older and suddenly... you find yourself... all alone.
Jenny: You deserve to be alone.
Mario: Somebody's out there.
Detective Cranston: She is a weird little girl. Did you notice her tits? When I put the tube around her she looked at me, like she wanted me to feel her up.