Quotes from Peter Sellers movies and TV shows - page 2 of 2

Hrundi V. Bakshi: We have a saying in India.
Michelle Monet: Yes?
Hrundi V. Bakshi: Yes.
Michelle Monet: Well?
Hrundi V. Bakshi: Well what?

Hrundi V. Bakshi: This is a particularly good one because it helps you always to remember how many days there are in each month. It goes like this: Thirty days have September, October, June and February, all the rest have 29, except my brother who got six months.

Hrundi V. Bakshi: Hrundi V. Bakshi.
Michelle Monet: Pardon?
Hrundi V. Bakshi: That is what my name is called.

C. S. Divot: You mashuga.
Hrundi V. Bakshi: I am not your sugar.

Clouseau: You're the cook?
Mr. Shork: No, I'm the gardener!
Clouseau: Ah, now we're getting somewhere!

Mrs. Leverlilly: You've ruined that piano!
Clouseau: What is the price of one piano compared to the terrible crime that's been committed here?
Mrs. Leverlilly: But that's a priceless Steinway!
Clouseau: Not anymore.

Francois: Do you know what kind of a bomb it was?
Clouseau: The exploding kind.

Clouseau: Does your dog bite?
Hotel Clerk: No.
Clouseau: Nice doggie.
[Dog barks and bites Clouseau in the hand.]
Clouseau: I thought you said your dog did not bite!
Hotel Clerk: That is not my dog.

Clouseau: Now then, what do we know? One, that Professor Fassbinder and his daughter have been kidnapped. Two, that someone has kidnapped them. Three, that my hand is on fire.

Clouseau: This is a very serious matter, and everyone is this reum is under the suspicions.
Cook: Reum?
Clouseau: What was that?
Cook: You said 'reum'?
Clouseau: Yes, I know that!

Dr. Fritz Fassbender: When did all this come to an end?
Michael James: It didn't come to an end! That's the point.

Anna Fassbender: Is she prettier than me?
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: Is she prettier than you? I'M prettier than you.

Dr. Fritz Fassbender: I am a doctor of the mind.
Victor Skakapopulis: Really?
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: Yes.
Victor Skakapopulis: I have terrible emotional problems. Could you help me?
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: You certainly picked a very odd time to ask me, just in the middle of a suicide.

Dr. Fritz Fassbender: My wife, the creature that ate Europe, is here.

Dr. Fritz Fassbender: If it fails, then we'll try something else, because I use all kinds of unorthodox methods. For example, I've had the greatest success shutting people in dark closets.

Dr. Fritz Fassbender: My father, the most beloved gynecologist in Vienna, before they took him away on a morals charge for indecent exposure at the State Opera House, said, and I quote: "Please do not take me away, I will not do it again."
Victor Skakapopulis: Brilliant quote.
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: He was a brilliant pervert.

Dr. Fritz Fassbender: You'll like this group analysis, it's a real freak show. If it gets dull, we sing songs.