Alice: You still fancy me?
Dan: ...Of course.
Alice: You're lying. I've been you.
Dan: I love you, and I need a piss.
Dan: What's so great about the truth? Try lying for a change, it's the currency of the world.
Alice: So this man comes into the café today, and he says, "Hey waitress, what are you waiting for?"
Dan: Funny guy.
Alice: So I go, "I'm waiting for a man to come in here and fuck me sideways with a beautiful line like that."
Dan: So what did he ask for?
Alice: He asked for a cup of tea with two sugars.
Dan: I'm your stranger. Jump.
Inman: I imagine God is weary of being called down on both sides of an argument.
Alan Krumwiede: It's a bad day to be a rhesus monkey.
Dom Hemingway: Oh, my head is throbbing. It's fuckin' throbbin', Dickie. Like a disco in my head. Like a fucking Manila disco full of transvestites and suckling pigs.
Paolina: I don't know who this man is.
Dom Hemingway: Oh. I'll tell you who I am. I'm the fucker who'll tear your nose off with my teeth. I'm the fucker who will gut you with a dull cheese knife and sing Gilbert and Sullivan while I do it. I'm the fucker who'll dump your dead body in a freezing cold lake and watch you sink to the bottom like so much shit. I am that fucker. That's the fucker who I am.
Dom Hemingway: I'm Dom. Dom is English for "unlucky son of a bitch."
Join the mailing list
Separate from membership, this is to get updates about mistakes in recent releases. Addresses are not passed on to any third party, and are used solely for direct communication from this site. You can unsubscribe at any time.
Check out the mistake & trivia books, on Kindle and in paperback.