Quotes from Campbell Scott movies and TV shows

Victor Geddes: My mother said, "You don't have to like everything, but you have to try everything."
Hilary O'Neil: Oh, my mother always said, "Pass the Velveeta."

Hilary O'Neil: What is it?
Victor Geddes: Raw cow... dead.
Hilary O'Neil: What if I throw up?
Victor Geddes: Then I'll take care of you.

Hilary O'Neil: I told Estelle you have a terminal disease.
Victor Geddes: What?
Hilary O'Neil: Assholeitis.

Malachi: And may I assume from the intense odor of mayonnaise you'll be dining in tonight?
Victor Geddes: Uh, actually, no, we're going out, right, honey?
Hilary O'Neil: Sure.
Victor Geddes: We're going out.

Ethan Thomas: I'm looking at your list of published articles, doctor. You've been quite busy, prolific. So, based on your time spent with holy rollers, snake handlers, voodoo priestesses and Indians tripping on peyote buds, based on observing these bizarre individuals, you've concluded that possession is a basic typical human experience?
Dr. Adani: I must say, counselor, that's quite a laundry list of disdain and one that thoroughly mischaracterizes my research.

Robert Benchley: You'd have to wear out a pretty large hole in your pocket to lose me, Mrs. Parker.

Steve Dunne: I just happened to be nowhere near your neighborhood.

Joe Ross: You could call me Joe.
Susan Ricci: Yeah, long as I didn't take that as inducement to, you know, further intimacy.

Jimmy Dell: Do the American thing.
Joe Ross: What's that?
Jimmy Dell: Marry a rich widow.
Joe Ross: We used to say, a nymphomaniac who owns a liquor store.

Joe Ross: Funny old world.
Susan Ricci: Funny old world? Dog my cats.
Joe Ross: Dog my cats indeed.

Joe Ross: Stun gun? What if you missed?
United States Marshal: Well then, it would be back to the range for me.

Jimmy Dell: I think you'll find that if what you've done for them is as valuable as you say it is, if they are indebted to you morally but not legally, my experience is they will give you nothing, and they will begin to act cruelly toward you.
Joe Ross: Why?
Jimmy Dell: To suppress their guilt.