Marge Simpson: How did the pig tracks get on the ceiling?
Homer Simpson: Spider-Pig, Spider-Pig does whatever a Spider-Pig does... Can he swing from a web? No he can't, he's a pig. Look out, he is the Spider-Pig.
Ralph Wiggum: I like men now!
Grandpa: Homer, what the hell are you doing?!
Homer: risking my life to save people I hate for reasons I'm not quite sure why!
Moe Syzlak: Are you saying we're trapped like rats?
Russ Cargill: No, rats can't be trapped this easily. You're trapped like...carrots.
Tom Hanks: Hi, I'm Tom Hanks saying if you see me in public, please leave me be.
Marge Simpson: I hate being late.
Homer Simpson: Well I hate going. Why can't I worship the Lord in my own way: by praying like hell on my deathbed.
Marge Simpson: Homer, they can hear you inside!
Homer Simpson: Relax. Those pious morons are too busy talking to their phony-baloney God.
[Stony stares from the congregation.]
Homer Simpson: Hey, how you doing? Peace be with you. Praise Jebus.
Homer: We have a great life here in Alaska, and we're never going back to America again!
Answer: I believe the joke is supposed to be that the way Texans speak is a language all its own.
Damian Torres