Gwen: Your pillow's better than mine.
Danny: How will you get Eddy and Gwen there?
Lee: Don't worry. I know somebody.
Lee: Why am I here? I'm just confused. I mean, after all, you did fire me last week, so why am I here?
Dave: I brought you here to see the new Hal Weidmann film.
Wellness Guide: Are you comfortable speaking about Gwen?
Eddie: Think I should?
Wellness Guide: There's no "should."
Eddie: Think I can?
Wellness Guide: What is "can"?
Gwen: Eddie's really good... and he's my pillar of strength, you know. It's like Sodom and Gomorrah.
Gwen: Everyone hates me, everyone wants a piece of me. My therapist is out of the country, I wasn't nominated for a Golden Globe this year! Leave me alone.
Kiki: I bet you've never read a book in your life.
Gwen: Ha! I read all four of the Harry Potter books.
Kiki: You know the expression, "falling off the wagon", Lee? This is what it looks like.
Lee: Yeah, but you got twenty or thirty pounds of food to break your fall. What the hell happened?
Kiki: Bad morning. Preceded by thirty three bad years.
Lee: Does this have something to do with Gwen?
Dave: Remember the crazy guy in the woods?
Davis: Ted Kaczynski.
Dave: Who, the guy at Fox?
Lee: The Unabomber.
Dave: Yeah, the Unabomber. Okay? Remember how he lived in that little cabin?
Lee: So?
Dave: Hal Weidmann bought that cabin from the government and had it moved onto his property. That is where he edits his movies. That is his little, twisted, sicko office.
Lee: Ladies and gentlemen, here they are... Eddie and Gwen, together again! America's Sweethearts.
Hector: What? I'm not invited to the "hunket?"
Lee: I'm thorry, it wath the thudio'th dethithion.
Wellness Guide: We have a saying, Edward: "Mecka lecka halava, beem sala beem."
Eddie: What is that? Bean salad?
Wellness Guide: "Mecka lecka halava, beem sala beem."
Eddie: What does that mean?
Wellness Guide: I don't know what it means, it's very old.
Gwen: It's just not fair. There's all this pressure on me, and none whatsoever on Eddie, is there? He's probably all Summer having the time of his life.
Lee: They liked the movie. The press actually liked this crazy movie. They're calling it the "Blair Bitch Project."
