Buddy Hobbs: I didn't know you had elves working here!
Miles Finch: You're hilarious, my friend.
Walter Hobbs: He doesn't, uh...Get back to the story, please.
Miles Finch: So, on the cover above the title.
Buddy Hobbs: Does Santa know that you left the workshop?
Miles Finch: You know, we're all laughing our heads off.
Buddy Hobbs: Did you have to borrow a reindeer to get down here?
Walter Hobbs: Buddy. Go back to the basement!
Miles Finch: Hey, Jack-weed! I get more action in a week than you've had in your entire life. I've got houses in LA, Paris and Vale, each one of them with a seventy-inch plasma screen. So I suggest you wipe that stupid smile off your face before I come over there and smack it off! You feeling strong, my friend? Call me elf one more time!
Buddy Hobbs: He's an angry elf!
Buddy: We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns and syrup.
[Buddy sees the mail room for the first time.]
Buddy: It's just like Santa's workshop! Except it smells like mushrooms, and everyone looks like they want to hurt me.
Buddy: You sit on a throne of lies!
Buddy: [explaining cabs.] Watch out for the yellow ones. They don't stop!
Buddy: [Answering the phone.] Buddy the Elf, what's your favourite colour?
Emily: We can't just throw him out in the snow.
Walter: Why not? He loves the snow. He's told me 15 times.
Elf Teacher: Now, before we learn how to build the latest in extreme graphic chipset processors, let's recite the code of the elves, shall we?
Buddy: What's your favorite color?
Answer: Yes.