Doug McKenzie: Yeah. OK, well, uh, we found, uh, this mouse in a bottle of your beer, eh. Like, we was at a party and, uh, a friend of ours - a COP - had some, and he puked. And he said, uh, come here and get free beer or, uh, he'll press charges.
Bob McKenzie: I gotta take a leak so bad I can taste it.
Doug McKenzie: I am your father, Luke. Give in to the dark side of the force, you knob.
Bob McKenzie: He saw Jedi 17 times, eh.
Claude Elsinore: And I'd like to point out that these tapes have not been faked, or altered in any way. In fact they have time coding, which is very hard to fake.
The Judge: For the benefit of the court would you please explain "time coding."
Claude Elsinore: Well, uh... just because I don't know what it is, it doesn't mean I'm lying.
Bob McKenzie: This movie was shot in 3B - three beers - and it looks good, eh?
Bob McKenzie: I was like a one-man army, like Charlton Heston in "Omega Man." You ever see it? Beauty.
Gertrude: We'll always have our memories. The Colonel's dead. Here we are still enjoying his chicken.