Mad Hatter: What's the matter my dear, don't you care for tea?
Alice: Why, yes. I'm very fond of tea.
March Hare: If you don't care for tea, you could at least make polite conversation.
Alice: Curiouser and curiouser.
Queen of Hearts: Who's been painting my roses red? WHO'S been painting MY roses RED? /Who dares to taint / With vulgar paint / The royal flower bed? / For painting my roses red / Someone will lose his head.
Card Painter: Oh no, Your Majesty, please! It's all his fault.
Card Painter: Not me, your grace! The ace, the ace.
Queen of Hearts: You?
Card Painter: No, two.
Queen of Hearts: The deuce, you say?
Card Painter: Not me! The three.
Queen of Hearts: That's enough! Off with their heads.
Dodo: I say, you'll never get dry that way.
Alice: Get dry?
Dodo: Have to run with the others. First rule of a caucus race, you know.
Alice: Curiosity often leads to trouble.
Alice: In my world, the books would be nothing but pictures.
Alice: Oh, pooh. I'm not afraid of you. Why, you're nothing but a pack of cards.
Mad Hatter: No wonder you're late. Why, this watch is exactly two days slow.
Daisy: What kind of a garden do you come from?
Alice: Oh, I don't come from any garden.
Daisy: Do you suppose she's a wildflower?
Alice: I'm sorry I interrupted your birthday party. Thank you.
March Hare: Birthday? My dear child, this is not a birthday party.
Mad Hatter: Of course not. This is an unbirthday party.
Mad Hatter: Clean cup, clean cup! Move down.
Dodo: Ahoy, and other nautical expressions.
Alice: When I get home I shall write a book about this place... If I ever do get home.
Mad Hatter: Would you like a little more tea?
Alice: Well, I haven't had any yet, so I can't very well take more.
March Hare: Ah, you mean you can't very well take less.
Mad Hatter: Yes. You can always take more than nothing.
Alice: Oh dear, everything is so confusing.
Caterpillar: It is not.
Alice: Well, it is to me.
Caterpillar: Why?
Alice: Well, I can't remember things like I used to, and.
Caterpillar: Recite.
Doorknob: Read the directions and directly you will be directed in the right direction.
Cheshire Cat: You know? We could make her really angry! Shall we try?
Alice: Oh, no, no.
Cheshire Cat: Oh, but it's loads of fun.
March Hare: I have an excellent idea, lets change THE subject.
King of Hearts: Rule 42: All persons more than a mile high must leave the court immediately.
Alice: I am not a mile high, and I'm not leaving.
Queen of Hearts: Sorry. Rule 42, you know.





Chosen answer: There is no real answer. It is intended to be left unknown. See http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a5_266.html for The Straight Dope's answer.
Guy