Osmosis Jones: You're gonna have to talk to my new partner, if he feels like hangin' around a little while.
Drix: But my work visa's expired.
Osmosis Jones: Well, we'll go down to the hemorrhoid and get you a good lawyer.
Officer on radio: Suspect is heading towards the uvula. Repeat, heading towards the uvula.
Osmosis Jones: What the heck is a u-vala?
Drix: It's that little dangly thing that hangs down in Frank's...
Osmosis Jones: Boxer shorts! OK, here we go!
Drix: Not that little dangly thing! The one in his throat!
Osmosis Jones: I knew that, I knew that.
Mayor Phlegmming: Good evening, citizens of Frank. In the past few weeks of the campaign, my opponent has thrown around a lot of fancy words to try to confuse the issues. Words like "exercise", "low-fat", and "diet." Words designed to scare us into changing what has worked for so many years. Well, I say, let's stay the course. Remember, a fat Frank is a happy Frank.
Leah: What? That's not what I wrote.
Mayor Phlegmming: I propose something that every organism in this city will enjoy. I give you a dream vacation to the annual chicken wing festival in Buffalo, New York. Final plans have been made and nothing is going to stand in our way!
Shane Detorre: [As Frank is about to eat the egg that fell on the ground] Dad! That's filthy!
Frank Detorre: Honey, ten-second rule. Hits the ground, you pick it up within ten seconds, you can eat it. [Bites into the egg] Mmmm.
Shane: Ugh!
Osmosis: We were so poor, we lived off peanut butter and cellulite sandwiches! You ever try to blow-dry your hair with a fart?
Drix: OK, I get it. You were poor.
Osmosis: You bet I was! You ever try to make a snowman out of toilet paper cling-ons? Now that's poor!
Drix: OK, please, you're going to make me vomit!
Osmosis: Vomit? We couldn't afford no vomit; that's for rich folk.
Drix: Excuse me while I wipe my eyes.
Osmosis: Oh, you wanna talk about wiping?
Drix: No.
