Andrew Wyke: Whether I love her or not, I found her. I've kept her. She represents me. Once, she was in love with me.
Milo Tindle: And now she's in love with me. And you can't forgive that.
Inspector Doppler: Over the years my eyes have been adequately trained to see things for themselves, sir.
Andrew Wyke: I have nothing against lapsed Catholics. In fact, some of my best friends are lapsed Catholics.
Andrew Wyke: You said everything was in plain view.
Milo Tindle: Well aren't I the shifty old sly boots, then.
Andrew Wyke: Wit in the face of adversity! Good! You've learned something from the English.
Andrew Wyke: Property's always been more highly regarded in this country than people.
Milo Tindle: Why don't you ask yourself how your man Merridick would go about the search?
Andrew Wyke: Merridew! St. John Lord Merridew.
Milo Tindle: Alright, I'll do it. Where do you want me to break in?
Andrew Wyke: Not so fast. You've got to get disguised first.
Milo Tindle: What for?
Andrew Wyke: Suppose somebody saw you coming.
Milo Tindle: Here? In the middle of nowhere? I could hardly find this place with a bloody map.
Andrew Wyke: You never know. A dallying couple, a passing sheep-rapist.
Milo Tindle: A turnstile to the bedrooms?
Andrew Wyke: One way or another, one always pays to get in.
Andrew Wyke: My wife showers. I bathe.
Andrew Wyke: Milo, baby, lemme handle this one, eh? Crime's my baaag. I got this caper worked out ta the last detail.
Andrew Wyke: It's sex! Sex is the game! Marriage is the penalty. Round and round we jog towards each futile anniversary. Pass "Go." Collect 200 rows, 200 silences, 200 scars in the deep places.
Andrew Wyke: There's nothing like a little bit of mayhem to cheer one up.
Andrew Wyke: Put that back, please! It's an old Egyptian blocking game. It's taken me rather a long time to get it there.
Andrew Wyke: You shit.
Milo Tindle: Grazie mille.
Andrew Wyke: You all-time, knockdown, champion bastard, Milo.
Milo Tindle: You're too kind.
Inspector Doppler: Not to appear facetious, sir, but you had better tell that to a judge.
Andrew Wyke: There are certain skills best acquired in public bars, I suppose.
Andrew Wyke: So I understand you wish to marry my wife.
Milo Tindle: We are from different worlds, you and me, Andrew. In mine, there was no time for bright fancies and happy inventions, no stopping for tea. The only game we played was to survive, or go to the wall. If you didn't win, you just didn't finish. Loser, lose all. You probably don't understand that.
Andrew Wyke: You're not giving me any kind of a chance, you sadistic bloody Wop.
Milo Tindle: I hope I didn't hear that correctly.