Shanghai Noon (2000)

Medicine Man: Don't worry, it could be worse - he could be a white guy.

Roy O'Bannon: Holy crap, the vultures are eating my head.

Roy O'Bannon: There's more to life than money. I hope you learn that one day.

Roy O'Bannon: Come on. We're men, we're not pinatas.

Sioux Chief: Daughter, husbands like Man-Who-Fights-in-Dress don't come along every day.

Chon Wang: We stick together. We are partners.
Roy O'Bannon: That's beautiful.

Chon Wang: You killed my uncle.
Roy O'Bannon: Bull! That was Wallace! All the way.
Chon Wang: He was one of your bandits.
Roy O'Bannon: He wasn't part of my gang! He was a new guy! And he's crazy as a road lizard.

Roy O'Bannon: So who are you?
Chon Wang: I'm an Imperial Guard to the Emperor of China.
Roy O'Bannon: China... what's with the book?
Chon Wang: The book belongs to Princess Pei Pei. She was kidnapped from the Forbidden City.
Roy O'Bannon: I like that, Forbidden City, a princess, kidnapped! It's so mysterious.

Princess Pei Pei: Father, is this my husband-to-be? He's a toad. If the Emperor is so fond of him, why doesn't he marry him?

Chon Wang: I got an idea: why don't I pretend I'm sick, and then you can attack the guard when they come in?
Roy O'Bannon: Oh, you mean the sick prisoner routine? Does that still work in China? 'Cause here it's sorta been done to death.

Roy O'Bannon: I don't know karate, but I know kar-azy, and I will use it.

Roy O'Bannon: Yes, John, I've heard all about the Emperor. Must be one hell of a man.
Chon Wang: He's only twelve.
Roy O'Bannon: Are you kidding me? You're sitting here, waiting to die for someone whose balls haven't even dropped?

Chon Wang: See! I told you so.
Roy O'Bannon: No, you said "wet shirt don't break," not "piss shirt bend bar".

Marshal Nathan Van Cleef: Mighty impressive hardware you packin' there.
Roy O'Bannon: Why don't you get your eyes of my package, you twisted son of a bitch.

Chon Wang: He took the gold.
Roy O'Bannon: Is that all you care about, the gold? Shame on you.

Lo Fong: One thing about the Chinese, Mr. Andrews. We do not renegotiate.

Imperial Guard: On the battlefield, a soldier can't always obey the General's orders.

Princess Pei Pei: Whatever you think I'm going to do for you, you're wrong.

Roy O'Bannon: Is that her? She's pretty! Grab her.

Chon Wang: This is the West, not the East. The sun may rise where we come from... but here is where it sets.