Damon Pennington: No prison in the world is airtight.
Dean: I feel like men are more romantic than women. When we get married we marry, like, one girl, 'cause we're resistant the whole way until we meet one girl and we think I'd be an idiot if I didn't marry this girl she's so great. But it seems like girls get to a place where they just kinda pick the best option... 'Oh he's got a good job.' I mean they spend their whole life looking for Prince Charming and then they marry the guy who's got a good job and is gonna stick around.
Liz Gilbert: I'm sick of people telling me that I need a man.
Felipe: You don't need a man, Liz. You need a champion.
Tess Carroll: You didn't die in that car crash, Charlie.
Charlie St. Cloud: Actually, I did.
Sofia D'Souza: Radio station has sent a new producer. Shall I send him?
Ethan Mascarenhas: Forget that damn producer! What about my bedsores? You have not done a single thing right since today morning. You seem to forget a lot nowadays. The only thing you do enjoy is changing my pajamas.
Caliban: This island is mine.
Matty: Let me ask you something, how do you know when you're in love?
Bullpen Pitcher: Well.
Matty: What?
Bullpen Pitcher: I've got a way, whenever this one thing happens I know I'm done. I will tell you but its personal and I don't want anybody making fun of me for it.
Matty: No, no-ones going to... just go.
Bullpen Pitcher: I think I'm in love with somebody when I wear a condom with the other girls, OK?
Matty: Holy shit I'm in love.
Beth's Dad: You could get your heart broken or... you could have the greatest love affair the world has ever known. But you're never gonna know unless you try.
Roger Greenberg: Um... can the pool overflow?
Phillip Greenberg: Yes, the pool can fucking overflow! What the fuck's going on over there?
Roger Greenberg: It's raining.
Phillip Greenberg: Have a great vacation. Thank you. Take care of my house and dog. Oh, is he dead? Sorry.
Roger Greenberg: You know what? I asked you a question.
Phillip Greenberg: "Can the pool overflow?" Fuck you.
Miss Emily: We didn't have the Gallery in order to look into your souls. We had the Gallery in order to see if you had souls at all.
Jordan: It's a nice day if you like that sort of thing.
Mama Jenny: Oh, you hungry child? You want a little dinner?
Rizwan Khan: No, I want lots of dinner.
Katie Marks: I've never been closer to anyone, and I don't know you at all.
Veronica 'Ronnie' Miller: Truth only means something when it's hard to admit! Don't you get that?
Mike Pomeroy: You know what I've noticed, people only say "lighten up" when they're gonna stick their fist up your ass.
Claire Foster: Honey, If I'm gonna get whacked off, I...
[Phil laughs.]
Claire Foster: What are you smiling about?
Phil Foster: No, no, we might get bumped off. We're not going to get whacked off.
Claire Foster: I think we are!