Reuben Feffer: Ahh... rat in the house.
Polly Prince: That's not a rat, that's my ferret.
Madam Suliman: It's time to put an end to this idiotic war.
Pastor Dan Parker: I'm a sexy man of God, and I know it.
Chow Mo Wan: When you don't take "no" for an answer, there is still a chance you'll get what you want.
Stacy: If we were the share our lives together, why didn't we share our lives together. I know you don't have to tell me everything Derek, but why wouldn't you want too? Unless there is someone else you are waiting for.
Mrs. Peatree: Are you kidding me? We conduct a nationwide manhunt for you and you're boning the suspect? Did you think this was a joke?"Let's divert federal resources and man hours so I can have my collegiate lesbian fling in style."
Amy: I was doing research.
Mrs. Peatree: I'll bet.
John Clasky: They should name a gender after you.
John Clasky: Looking at you doesn't do it, staring is the only way that makes sense.
John Clasky: And trying not to blink so you don't miss anything.
John Clasky: And all of that and you're you.
John Clasky: It's just that you are drop dead crazy gorgeous.
John Clasky: So much so, that I'm actually considering looking at you again before we finish up here.
Dan Foreman: Guys, I feel very terrible about what I'm about to say. But I'm afraid your both being let go.
Lou: Let go? What does that mean?
Dan Foreman: It means you're being fired, Louie.
Flynn Carsen: She may have been in cahoots with Wilde all along! Cahoots... I've been cahooted.
Clementine: You're not a stalker, or anything, right?
Joel: I'm not a stalker. YOU'RE the one that talked to me, remember?
Clementine: That is the oldest trick in the stalker book.
Joel: Really? There's a stalker book? Great, I gotta read that one.
Mrs. Sedley: I thought her a mere social climber, but now I see she's a mountineer.
Julia Lambert: I've decided to retire and let myself go. I'll have potatoes for lunch and potatoes for dinner and beer. God, I love beer! And treacle pudding and cherry tart and cream, cream, cream, cream, cream, cream... as god is my judge, I'll never eat a lettuce leaf again.
Ben Calder: If I kiss you, do you think they'll shoot me?
Anna Foster: No, but I will if you don't.
Slannen the Elf: Open up! I am Miss Ella's legal representation.
Dungeon Guard: Her what?
Slannen the Elf: Her lawyer, numbskull! If the gauntlet doesn't fit, you must acquit.
Jin: You and I are just pawns on a chessboard.
Ferrari: I know I lost my virginity at prom. How about you? When did you lose your virginity?
April: When I was ten.
Ferrari: Okay, moving on.
Javier Suarez: It's like dancing with my mother's ironing board.
Miles Raymond: Hey, what should I wear?
Jack: I don't know, something casual but nice. They think you're a writer.
James Lansome: Lucky Charm secure.
Jan: I've got news for you, Corporate Man: your days are numbered.