Ed: Listen to me, dude, I'm having a really fucked-up, really wet, very bad fucking day.
Alfred: Could it be an old foe in a new disguise? Perhaps Catwoman?
Bruce Wayne: No. Even Selina Kyle has more regard for human life. This is someone entirely new, Alfred. The last thing Gotham City needs is some vigilante running amok.
Alfred: As they say in the streets, I ain't touching that one.
Marion Harrington: I'm pregnant.
Richard Harrington: I smoke pot?.
Chloe: It was the only way to help him stop.
Miranda: Stop what?
Chloe: Stop fucking me.
Mr. Sir: There ain't nothing down there. We woulda found it by now.
Mr. Pendanski: I wouldn't tell the queen bee that.
Mr. Sir: I ain't on stupid pills!
Eun-ju: Do you know what's really scary? You want to forget something. Totally wipe it off your mind. But you never can. It can't go away, you see. And... and it follows you around like a ghost.
Sean Devine: What the fuck am I gonna tell him?"Hey, Jimmy. God said you owed another marker. He came to collect."
Woo-jin Lee: Dae-su Oh talks too much.
Thomas Garrett: Oh, women. Can't live with 'em. Can't live with 'em.
The Bishop: They came only to see, from the east and from the west, from the city and from the plain. They came not, in holy reverence to the lord, but in lust.
Ron Launius: What the fuck am I going to do with a microwave?
John Holmes: You can heat food with it.
Ron Launius: The only thing I want to heat up right now is some dope.
Chuck: God only knows what that woman is capable of.
Grace: You know she's not capable of anything.
Jim: Where's that scary albino when you need him?
Sarah Morton: Awards are like hemorrhoids. Sooner or later every asshole gets one.
Detective Malloy: Some women give terrible blowjobs. No rhythm at all. No sense of cock whatsoever.
Detective Park Doo-Man: There's a reason people say I have a shaman's eyes.
Rabbit: Who am I forgetting?
Winnie the Pooh: I don't know Rabbit. Let's ask Piglet.