Alyssa: Can men fuck each other?
Banky Edwards: Are you asking for my permission?
Steve: Who says we want what we think we want? We want what we think we are supposed to want? Like what the books tell us to want. And the movies. That's what I wanted. Happy. Happy, happy, happy. Shit like that, ok? We didn't get that. That's the end of that. Ok? It's not... the end of us. It's the end of a dream, that's all. You wake up in the morning, the dream's over, so what? We're still here.
Kenny: I'm gonna call the Ghostbusters on your ass.
Maggie: I don't want him back, I just want him vaporized, extinguished! When I'm done with him, he'll be just a twitching little stain on the floor.
Kate: Every time she smiles, remember that I love you more.
Gilbert Bates: Yo, I'm Gilbert. This summer, my parents shipped me off to camp. I caught impetigo. And when I got back, my dad had moved out. Only since then he moved back, but he's still sleepin' in my room and he's sleeping on the couch.
Andy McDermott: Great. Come to Paris and check out les drains.
Dale Putley: Come on Jack.
Jack Lawrence: Whoa, where are you going?
Dale Putley: Kick some ass.
Helen Holt: There's different kinds of love, darling. Some people you love no matter what, and others you love if the situation is right. To me, the best kind of love is the "no matter what" kind.
John Brown: You tell Her Majesty that if her husband were here he'd tell her to get out of the house and get some air into her lungs.
The Voice: When we are all criminals, who is free?
Kate Mosley: Hey, get your hands off my stems.
Nuria: Do you believe in god?
Richard Rietti: Maybe he's the person that he con'd the most. I mean we all do that, you know. We all keep a little bit of ourselves hidden. Cuz if we didn't, well, then we'd have to look at who we are. Who we really are. And if we didn't like it, well, we'd have nobody to blame but ourselves.
Celine: Despite your crummy poem, I came to see you and all you could do was humiliate me and turn me away. I thought you were decent, but it turns out you're just a lying, cheating bastard like all the rest.
Curtis Freley: Everyone who plays the game understands the rules.
Bobby Brahms: So, is he attractive?
Arthur Pape: I'm not supposed to notice these things, but I believe the word is "hot."
Harry Block: Look, I was merely explaining to you why my choice of necessity is confined to your practice.