Hitchhiker: Thanks for the ride, lady.
Horace: Wolfman's got nards.
Grandpa: One thing I about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach. All the damn vampires.
Michael Brody: Dad died of a heart attack!
Ellen Brody: No. He died from fear. Fear of that shark.
Mrs. Biddle: This man out of absolutely nowhere, this man appeared. Heh! So charming. Not really handsome, but... riveting. Yes, that's the word. I was riveted. I was looking into his eyes, and I found myself thinking thoughts I hadn't entertained since World War II. I think I actually... blushed.
Terrence 'Terry' Chandler: We accidently summoned demons who used to rule the universe to come and take over the world.
Glen: Yeah, we found out about it from, uh, one of Terry's albums.
Jerry Blake: Hodgkins, what's to get wrong?
Loy Colton: Caleb, those people back there, they wasn't normal. Normal folks, they don't spit out bullets when you shoot 'em, no sir.
Brian: What happened? You talk numbers, you get romantic. You talk people, you clam up.
Catherine: Just a little miscue, that's all.
Ricky Caldwell: My old lady couldn't afford to send me to college. So I got a job. I was washing dishes, dumping trash... all that sort of shit. I think you're gonna like this next part. It sounded like some squirrel getting his nuts squeezed.
The Driller Killer: Let's buzzzzz.
Ferrari: It's looking fine just the way it is. I think you've pushed the erotic angle about as far as you can.
Peter: The "erotic angle"? Mr. Ferrari, where have you been all these years?
Jack Citron: You know this movie's about pop culture? In the 60s, Andy Warhol showed us how Pop could be high art. That everything is high art. That's what this is all about. For example, in your first scene you'll be gang raped by four monsters.
Freddy Krueger: Joey... look. All the little piggies come home.
Nancy Thompson: Let him go, Krueger.
Freddy Krueger: Your wish... is my command.
Little Girl: You're gonna hurt my kitty.
Pinhead: We'll tear your soul apart!
Jimmy Hallik: Relax... I'm not some kind of crazy killer.