
Inigo Montoya: Who are you?
Westley: No one of consequence.
Inigo Montoya: I must know.
Westley: Get used to disappointment.
Inigo Montoya: Okay.

Computer: This ship will self-destruct in exactly ten seconds. Counting down. Ten, nine, eight, six.
President Skroob: Six? What happened to seven?
Computer: Just kidding.

Daryl: Don't touch it! It could get infected, Jesus! He could get anything - Tetanus, rabies, scabies, emphysema.

Miss Rebecca Miller: David, are you drunk?

Jack Putter: We've got the chip.
Lt. Tuck Pendleton: All right.
Jack Putter: We're on the way to the lab.
Lt. Tuck Pendleton: All right.
Jack Putter: But I think they put someone in there with you.
Lt. Tuck Pendleton: All... what?

State Trooper: What the hell are you driving here?
Del: We had a small fire last night, but we caught it in the nick of time.
State Trooper: Do you have any idea how fast you were going?
Del: Funny enough, I was just talking to my friend about that. Our speedometer has melted and as a result it's very hard to see with any degree of accuracy exactly how fast we were going.

Lex Luthor: Lenny, I've always considered you the Dutch Elm disease in my family tree.

James Bond: Lovely girl with the cello.
Saunders: Forget the ladies for once, Bond.