David Lightman: [On the computer] Hello, are you still playing the game?
Joshua: Of course. I should reach Defcon 1 and release my missiles in 28 hours. Would you like to see some projected kill ratios?
David Lightman: Sixty-nine percent of the housing destroyed. Seventy-two million people dead. [Types into computer] Is this a game or is it real?
Joshua: What's the difference?
Mike Brody: White sharks are dangerous. I know 'em. My father, my brother, myself. They're murders.
Harry Callahan: We're not just going to let you walk out of here.
Crook: Who's "we", sucker?
Harry Callahan: Smith, and Wesson, and me.
Yoda: When 900 years old you reach, look as good you will not.
Donna Trenton: Damn this car.
Arnie Cunningham: Okay... show me.
Mary: You really wanna know what Norman's like?
Warren Toomey: Yeah.
Mary: Better than you'll ever be, fat boy.
Sarah Bracknell: You're looking good.
Johnny Smith: Yeah, it's called the coma diet - lose weight while ya sleep.
M: Remember, 007, you're on your own.
James Bond: Well, thank you, sir. That's a great comfort.
Viking Lofgren: Hey, lipshitz.
Horowitz: The name is Horowitz, asshole.
Viking Lofgren: Horowitz asshole?
Paco Moreno: I heard it was lipshitz.
Viking Lofgren: Yeah, and if your lip shits, what's your asshole doin'?
Nigel Pennington-Smythe: What are you doing?
Illya Kuryakin: Trying to get an explosive cap out of my boot heel, so I can blast the pipe apart so we can get out of here.
Nigel Pennington-Smythe: Why would they put the explosive cap in your shoe? You'll never get it with us hanging by these handcuffs from the pipe. You'd think somebody would have thought of a better spot to put it.
Illya Kuryakin: Well, that's progress I guess?
Q: Welcome back, Mr. Bond. I trust there will be lots of gratuitous sex and violence occurring.
Dr. Beck: You're the last one of your friends alive. You're the bait.
Karen Silkwood: What should I wear on the plane?
Angela: Uh, somethin' that won't wrinkle.
Drew Stephens: Yeah, like a shroud, maybe.
Angela: I get sooooo tired of yer jokes.
Superior Court Judge Steven R. Hardin: The law. Nothing is right or wrong! It's either the law or its not the law. Well, we got a problem here, because it's not working anymore. It turns out that right and wrong count.
Detective: "Don't F-U-C-K with the L.A.P.D."
Bruno: Tennis balls?
Laurie Kessler: My father's gonna kill you.
Warren Stacy: Oh, no, he's not. I know where he's at.
Laurie Kessler: That was him on the phone just now. He'll be here any second.
Warren Stacy: Oh, yeah? Then I guess I better hurry up.
Car Passenger: Hey... you wanna see something really scary?
Carl 'Buster' Marzack: I'm getting too old for this shit.