Gil: When I'm out for blood, I never let sex get in the way.
Susan the Monster: That's funny, for me it's just the other way around.
Tardy: Crayons taste like purple.
Count Blah: I don't even know where my pants are, bleh.
Gil: Tardy, how do you feel about Alison?
Tardy: I love Alison.
Alison Kaiser: Tardy, how do you feel about ashtrays?
Tardy: ...I love ashtrays.
Warren: I don't want to sing this song with Dottie! I don't want to sing this song with Blah! I want to sing it all by myself! Me, me, me, me, ME.
Gil: Warren, that's not the message we're trying to convey with the Sharing Song.
Greg: I left cookies and milk three nights in a row for God and he hasn't taken them. Why am I so forsaken.