Assault With A Deadly Dick - S1-E17
[School basketball team huddled in prayer] Coach Strickland: Dear Lord, if it be within your great wisdom and mercy, please grant us the strength and courage to beat the hell out of the Central High Muskrats. And if...
Tommy Solomon: Uh, excuse me, Coach?
Coach Strickland: We're in the middle of a prayer, Solomon.
Tommy: Yeah, but do you think we should be bothering God over a basketball game?
Coach Strickland: Well, this is important!
Tommy: But the other team's praying too. [Everyone looks at the other team] Oh, so our God is stronger than their God?
Coach Strickland: There's only one God, Solomon.
Tommy: Ah. Well, am I the only one seeing a conflict of interest here?
Coach Strickland: Yes!
Answer: The writers often have Dick respond to Mary with a retort that he thinks is in the common vernacular but makes a mistake in wording that is often funny. Dick seems to be imputing a criticism from Mary and responds with a corruption of the more common "I'm going to wear your ass like a hat!" I doubt it has anything to do with owing taxes. Probably just one of the writers assuming a common regional phrase would be universally recognized.
That makes total sense. I always interpreted it as perhaps snowshoes are an expensive item, and given that he was blaming Mary for his newfound financial woes, he was equating her living off his generosity and used snowshoeing as a metaphor.
Phaneron