Quotes from Tina Fey movies and TV shows - page 2 of 2

Dez: Not everyone can be Charles Drew inventing blood transfusions.
Joe: Or me, playing piano with Dorothea Williams. - I know.
Paul: You are not all that. Anyone could play in a band if they wanted to.
22: Don't pay Paul any mind. People like him just bring other people down so they can make themselves feel better.
Joe: Oh, I get it. He's just criticising me to cover up the pain of his own failed dreams.
Paul: You cut deep, Joe.

22: I'm gonna make you wish you never died.
Counselor Jerry: Most people wish that, 22.

Wendy Altman: Don't worry about Chelsea. Philip's skanky ex-girlfriends are a dime a dozen.
Tracy Sullivan: Do they all have to look like Victoria's Secret models?
Wendy Altman: She's not that hot.
Tracy Sullivan: Oh, come on! I would do her.
Wendy Altman: Yeah. I wouldn't say that in front of my brother.

Judd Altman: I don't understand the Shiva. Mom's not even Jewish, and dad was an atheist.
Wendy Altman: A Jewish atheist, and this is what he wanted.

Judd Altman: Three months ago I had a great job and a nice apartment and I was in love with my wife.
Wendy Altman: No, you weren't.
Judd Altman: No?
Wendy Altman: No. She was sleeping with somebody else for a year and you never noticed... How in love could you have been?
Judd Altman: Yep... That's fair.