Quotes from Peter MacNicol movies and TV shows

Sly: They've got Whit.
Dan: Who's got Whit? Wait, you're Whit.

David Langley: Why am I worried about this? You did it! All I gotta do is go tell 'em what happened. But they'll say, "Who left him alone with the picture?" And I'll say, "Me." And they'll say, "You're fired" and I'll say, "Fine." They'll say, "No, no, no, firing's not good enough. Let's prosecute you for negligence." I go to jail, my wife leaves me, my daughter becomes a prostitute, I wind up on death row sharing a cell with Butch McDick.

David Langley: I've given my life to art and from here on in, the only art I will get anywhere near are the pictures I draw on the pavement hoping passersby will throw nickels in my hat. I guess the long on the short of it: I wish I'd never been born.

Lt. Brutus: He's a genius, huh?
David Langley: That's what they tell me.
Lt. Brutus: Well, he looks like a fruitcake to me.

Thomas Renfield: I'm scheduled to meet Count Dracula.
Villager 1: Dracula!
Villager 2: Dracula!
Villager 3: Dracula!
Villager 4: Scheduled?

Galen: Are there other entrances?
Valerian: No! One's enough.

Galen: You're back! I thank the powers that made me.
Ulrich: Glad to see you, too. You didn't bring along anything to eat, by any chance?
Galen: Food?
Ulrich: But, come along, there's much to do.
Galen: No, please! I thought I was a sorcerer, I'm not. I thought I had power, I don't. You said to be strong. I wasn't.
Ulrich: But you were, my boy, you were. And you'll be stronger yet.

Steve Schmidt: Still think she's fit for office?
Rick Davis: Aw, who cares. In forty-eight hours no-one will even remember who she is.

Rick Davis: Culvahouse cleared her.
Steve Schmidt: With what? Wikipedia?

Rick Davis: Listen, I too wish that the American people would choose the future Abraham Lincoln or Thomas Jefferson, but unfortunately, that's not the way it works anymore. Now it takes movie-star charisma to get elected President, and Obama and Palin, that's what they are - they're stars.
Steve Schmidt: Primary difference being Sarah Palin can't name a Supreme Court decision, whereas Barack Obama was a constitutional law professor.
Rick Davis: Fuck you.

Stingo: I was twenty two, and a virgin, and was clasping in my arms at last the goddess of my unending fantasies. My lust was inexhaustible. Sophie's lust was both a plunge into carnal oblivion, and a flight from memory and grief. More than that, I now see it was a frantic attempt to beat back death.

Sophie: Stingo, you look... you look very nice, you're wearing your cocksucker.
Stingo: That's my "seersucker."