Mike Markkula: Steve Wozniak's employee number one, you're number two.
Steve Jobs: Wait a minute. I'm employee number one. Woz?
Steve Wozniak: Doesn't matter to me.
Steve Jobs: I'm employee number one around here.
Mike Markkula: I'm not saying anything. I wasn't implying anything.
Steve Jobs: All right, then I'll be zero. Woz, you can be number one. I'll be zero. Okay?
Quotes from Joey Slotnick movies and TV shows
Steve Wozniak: Microsoft? Nobody I knew ever heard of Microsoft. Or Bill Gates. I mean, they were nobodies. But then we were all nobodies, which was perfect for us. Because all the respectable, straight-arrow guys were busy doing what they always do, which is be respectable. Which meant the rest of us could run around acting like crazies, which is what we did best. I miss those days.
Steve Wozniak: Where's your beard?
Steve Jobs: In the bathroom sink. I shaved it off.
Steve Wozniak: Well, how come?
Steve Jobs: 'Cause banks don't like beards.
Steve Wozniak: Steve... you demolished that guy.
Steve Wozniak: Sometimes not knowing how crazy something is, is a good thing.
Steve Jobs: You are putting poison into your body.
Steve Wozniak: That's french fries, man. You know, all-American food?
Steve Jobs: That's what I'm talking about.
Steve Wozniak: Come on, I can't eat like you do. Eatin' fruit all the time? That's weird.
Steve Jobs: It's not weird. It's pure.