Quotes from James Roday movies and TV shows

Shawn Spencer: Good morning detectives, collecting money for the Policeman's ball?
Carlton Lassiter: We don't have balls.
Shawn Spencer: I honestly have no response to that.

Shawn Spencer: The spirits tell me your little pants are on fire.

Shawn Spencer: Gus, don't be a rabid porcupine.

Shawn Spencer: I'm Shawn Spenstar and this is by partner, Gus "TT" Showbiz.
Burton 'Gus' Guster: The extra T is for extra talent.

Shawn Spencer: Gus, don't be a myopic chihuahua.

Shawn Spencer: Gus, don't be a silly goose.

Juliet O'Hara: I had no idea you were so serious about bowling.
Shawn Spencer: Quite serious, quite serious. Matter of fact, Lego wants to sponsor me this year.
Juliet O'Hara: Oh my God, that's great.
Shawn Spencer: They also want me to wear shoes made out of Legos... So I'm torn.

Burton 'Gus' Guster: Are you crazy?
Shawn Spencer: I wouldn't say crazy. Maybe an eccentric who looks good in jeans.

Shawn Spencer: Gus, don't be a myopic chihuahua. I have a foolproof plan that solves the case and gives the Chief all the credit.
Burton 'Gus' Guster: What is it?
Shawn Spencer: Actually, all I have is the phrase "I have a foolproof plan." Beyond that, I'm wide open.

Shawn Spencer: The chips say you're a cheater, cheater pumpkin eater.

Burton 'Gus' Guster: Wasn't Howie the victim at one point?
Shawn Spencer: Gus, that is so forty minutes ago. I bet you're still telling your friends to chillax.

Burton 'Gus' Guster: Brazilian airport codes. How do you know that?
Shawn Spencer: I lived in an airport for a month, Gus.
Burton 'Gus' Guster: That was Tom Hanks in The Terminal.
Shawn Spencer: Same difference.

Shawn Spencer: Good morning, detectives! Collecting donations for the Policeman's Ball?
Carlton Lassiter: We don't have balls.
Shawn Spencer: I honestly have no response for that.
Carlton Lassiter: Need I remind you, Mr. Spencer, what happens when you interfere with a police investigation?
Shawn Spencer: Uhhh... The case gets solved?

Burton 'Gus' Guster: Great. Now you've gotten me kicked out of a funeral. Just add it to the list. Kicked out of Petsmart, kicked out of Santa's Village, kicked out of the Salvation Army.
Shawn Spencer: Dishonorably discharged.

Shawn Spencer: Gus, don't be an old sponge with hair hanging off it.

Shawn Spencer: Gus, don't be a melted chocolate chip cookie.

Shawn Spencer: Gus, don't be this crevice in my arm.

Shawn Spencer: I can't believe this. You lifted your look right off this mannequin.
Burton 'Gus' Guster: On the contrary, Shawn. Clearly, someone is stealing my look.
Shawn Spencer: Right... I did see Tommy Hilfiger creeping from bush to bush sketching you.

Carlton Lassiter: Hey, we found prints.
Shawn Spencer: Was he in a little red corvette?
Burton 'Gus' Guster: Under the cherry moon?
Carlton Lassiter: Finger prints.

Shawn Spencer: Don't be the American version of the British TV Gus.