Krenshaw: Jesus, Archer.
Archer: What?
Krenshaw: You think this is a game?
Archer: No, I think Jenga's a game.
Krenshaw: What if I had been real KGB?
Archer: I'd assume you'd be trying to suck a promotion out of some Russian guy's cock.
Quotes from H. Jon Benjamin movies and TV shows
Malory Archer: An erection?! The thought of me dead gives you an erection!?
Sterling Archer: No! Just half a one, the other half would have really missed you. I mean, not.
Lana: Well, go ahead and say it.
Archer: What?
Lana: That since we are going to die tomorrow, we should have sex.
Archer: Are you kidding? After seeing a tiger get murdered? Lana, I'm not in the mood! I mean, if you want to, I can watch while you masturbate, but just so you know, my heart's not going to be into it. It's going to be with that tiger's family. But, you know, go ahead and start.
Trinette: What the shit!?
Archer: I know, I'm not normally a tattoo guy, but-
Trinette: Not yours, shitbrains! His!
Archer: Yeah, it's like we got each other's backs, right?
Trinette: You can't tattoo a frickin' baby!
Archer: That's what the tattoo guy said. Had to slip him an extra hundred bucks.
Trinette: How about I slip somebody a hundred bucks to throw acid in your face!?
Archer: Cost more than that I bet to buy acid, Trinette.
Archer: She told you, a woman whose loose lips have sunk so many ships they should be named "Admiral Nelson" and "concept of torpedoes."
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