Chad: Let me give you a professional tip. The word is ASK.
Chad: What's the difference between a golf ball and a G-spot? I'll spend twenty minutes looking for a golf ball.
Chad: No matter what happens after it - jumped over for promotions, wife runs off with some biochemist, who knows what... But we would always have this thing to fall back on. We could always say, "Yeah, fine, but they never got me like we got her."
Chad: Life is for the taking, is it not?
Mike Banning: Stay in this room and wait for me to come back.
Benjamin Asher: And if you don't come back?
Mike Banning: Then you're fucked.
Benjamin Asher: That's inspiring. (00:58:00)
Benjamin Asher: I will not be executed as propaganda.
Burke: During your travels, it's important to always keep one thing in mind: when one thing ends, something else begins.
Bill: They hate that I'm working at their bank. I hate that I'm working at their bank.
James Rethrick: Michael Jennings is not a super agent, he's an engineer. but somehow he managed to escape from a double-locked room. How? Was it fate? No. Fate was on our side. That means someone who knew, changed something.
Roland Michell: There's no such thing as poets anymore.
Charles Porter: Mr. Skiles, is there anything you would have done differently?
Jeff Skiles: Yes. I'd do it in July.
Piper: Ever see a 50-foot shark?
Thomas Mackelway: I'm sorry?
Piper: A 50-foot shark. You ever seen one?
Thomas Mackelway: No.
Piper: Doesn't mean there aren't any.
Nick Naylor: Don't forget, I'm his father, you're just the guy who fucks his mom.
Nick Naylor: You know the guy who can pick up any girl? I'm him on crack.
Joey Naylor: Dad, why is the American government the best government?
Nick Naylor: Because of our endless appeals system.
Nick Naylor: My job requires a certain... Moral flexibility.
Nick Naylor: Now what we need is a smoking role model. A real winner.
Jeff Megall: Indiana Jones meets Jerry Maguire.
Nick Naylor: Right, on two packs a day.
Jeff Megall: Sony has a futuristic sci-fi movie they're looking to make.
Nick Naylor: Cigarettes in space?
Jeff Megall: It's the final frontier, Nick.
Nick Naylor: But wouldn't they blow up in an all oxygen environment?
Jeff Megall: Probably. But it's an easy fix. One line of dialogue. 'Thank God we invented the... You know, whatever device.'.
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