Quotes from A. Michael Baldwin movies and TV shows

Mike: I know you're not going to believe this, but these things were here, right in the garage, and they were going to get me.
Jody: Aww, give me a break, would you?
Mike: They were jumping on the car and making these weird sounds.
Jody: You're sure it wasn't that retarded kid, Timmy, up the street?
Mike: No, it was the same thing that chased me last night.

Jody: What's out there?
Mike: I don't know. It was little, brown and low to the ground.
Jody: Ahh, it was probably just a gopher in heat.

Reggie: Okay. I see it, I see it all now. What we gotta do is we gotta snag that tall dude and stomp the shit out of him, and we'll find out what the hell is going on up there. Yeah! We lay that sucker out flat and drive a stake right through his goddamn heart.
Mike: You gotta be shittin' me, man! That mother's strong.

Mike: There's this door down here, and I bet there's something behind it.