Gust Avrakotos: You know, me and three other guys are killing Russians. Is it possible that I met the only elected official in town who can help me?
Joanne Herring: Are you Catholic, Mr. Avrakatos?
Gust Avrakotos: Greek Orthodox.
Joanne Herring: Still a Christian, though.
Gust Avrakotos: Imagine my relief.
Joanne Herring: May I ask what it is that I've done to make you dislike me, Mr. Avrakotos?
Gust Avrakotos: I like you just fine, Mrs. Herring, it's just been my experience that when people with money and too much free time get involved in politics, pretty soon, I forget who it is I'm supposed to be shooting at.
Charlie Wilson: These things happened. They were glorious and they changed the world... and then we fucked up the endgame.
Joanne Herring: Charlie, I want you to defeat the Soviet Union, and end the Cold War.
Charlie Wilson: O-K.
Gust Avrakotos: As long as the press sees sex and drugs behind the left hand, you can park a battle carrier behind the right hand and no-one's gonna fucking notice.
Joanne Herring: He may be in trouble with the press, but he stayed out of jail. You don't see God's hand in this?
Gust Avrakotos: Well reasonable people can disagree, but I don't see God anywhere within miles of this. On the other hand, if you slept with me tonight, I bet you I could change my mind in a hurry.
Gust Avrakotos: It's called the Milan Anti-Tank Missile.
Charlie Wilson: Can the Afghans win without it?
Gust Avrakotos: No.
Charlie Wilson: End of discussion.
Charlie Wilson: Joanne Herring: "I miss you Charlie." Charlie Wilson: "Oh Joanne... I always miss you."
Mike Vickers: I've written it all in a report you can read. You'd be the first one who did.
Charlie Wilson: How old are you?
Mike Vickers: I'll be 30 next week.
Charlie Wilson: This is CIA's weapons expert?
Gust Avrakotos: One of them.
Charlie Wilson: But he's the most senior.
Gust Avrakotos: Look.
Chess Player #1: Mike.
Mike Vickers: Yeah, bishop to queen's knight 7.
Gust Avrakotos: See, he's playing without even looking at the board.
Charlie Wilson: That's a useful skill... if Afghanistan's ever invaded by Boris Spassky.
Zvi: You want me to steer Israel towards an arms deal with Egypt, Pakistan, and Saudi Arabia?
Charlie Wilson: Yes.
Zvi: Well, just one or two problems with that, just off the top of my head.
Charlie Wilson: Zvi.
Zvi: Afghanistan and Pakistan don't recognize our right to exist, we just got done fighting a war against Egypt, and everyone who has ever tried to kill me or my family has been trained in Saudi Arabia.
Gust Avrakotos: That's not true, Zvi. Some of them were trained by us.
Charlie's Angel #4: The Washington Post wants to know what you thought of your time in rehab.
Charlie Wilson: And what did you tell them?
Charlie's Angel #4: That the Congressman didn't go to rehab because they don't serve whiskey there.
Charlie Wilson: That's why you're my press secretary, boo-boo.
Charlie Wilson: Were you standing at the goddamn door listening to me? How could you even - That is a thick door! You stood there and you listened to me?
Gust Avrakotos: I didn't stand at the door. Don't be an idiot. I bugged the Scotch bottle.
Charlie Wilson: What.
Gust Avrakotos: It's got a little transmitter on it, I've got a little thing in my ear, get past it.
Charlie Wilson: What's the gift for?
Gust Avrakotos: It's from the Afghan desk for doubling the budget for the Mujahadeen.
Charlie Wilson: Well, thank you.
Gust Avrakotos: It was nothing.
Charlie Wilson: It's a nice bottle of scotch. Must have been hard to get.
Gust Avrakotos: No, doubling the budget was nothing. Ten million dollars for covert ops against the Russian army is meaningless. What are you, an infant?
Gust Avrakotos: And with Doc's backing, you'll get the votes of the other committee members.
Charlie Wilson: Yep.
Gust Avrakotos: I don't believe you.
Charlie Wilson: I don't care.
President Zia: Do you have the authority to do this?
Charlie Wilson: No, I'm actually in danger of breaking the Logan Act.
President Zia: ...I don't know what that is.
Charlie Wilson: I cannot just call up a judge and tell him what to do.
Larry Liddle: Why?
Charlie Wilson: Well cause it's against... a shitload of really good laws Garry.
Charlie Wilson: You know you've reached rock bottom when you're told you have character flaws by a man who hanged his predecessor in a military coup.
Gust Avrakotos: Excuse me, what the fuck?
