Mr. Edward Magorium: Unlikely adventures require unlikely tools.
Doctor: What are you doing?
Mr. Edward Magorium: I'm practicing the euphonium.
Doctor: The what?
Mr. Edward Magorium: I'm thinking of giving a concert in the psyche ward tomorrow.
Mr. Edward Magorium: Mutant, have you come to take me up on my hula hoop challenge?
Mr. Edward Magorium: A stroke, you unbrookable ninny. The only stroke I have ever had is one of genius.
Mr. Edward Magorium: Most of these are important papers... and some of them might be doodles I never had framed... I can't tell the difference in them.
Mr. Edward Magorium: Why are you lying?
Molly Mahoney: I have to.
Mr. Edward Magorium: But your pants will catch on fire.
Molly Mahoney: Sir.
Mr. Edward Magorium: Don't you agree, Mahoney?
Molly Mahoney: Um, not exactly, sir.
Mr. Edward Magorium: Perfect.
Eric Applebaum, the Hat Collector: All stories, even the ones we love, must eventually come to an end and when they do, it's only an opportunity for another story to begin.
Mr. Edward Magorium: 37 seconds.
Molly Mahoney: Great. Well done. Now we wait.
Mr. Edward Magorium: No. We breathe. We pulse. We regenerate. Our hearts beat. Our minds create. Our souls ingest. 37 seconds, well used, is a lifetime.
Molly Mahoney: Are you dying?
Mr. Edward Magorium: Light bulbs die, my sweet. I will depart.
Mr. Edward Magorium: I fell so completely in love with these shoes, I bought enough pairs to last my whole lifetime. This is my last pair.
Mr. Edward Magorium: I've been inventing toys since the 1770's.
Henry Weston: What, excuse me.
Mr. Edward Magorium: Yes?
Henry Weston: You say 1770's?
Mr. Edward Magorium: Yes, sir, so you can imagine accounting is a brand new concept to me.
Henry Weston: You know, that would make you at least 240 years old, sir.
Mr. Edward Magorium: You're already hired, mutant, there's no need to show off.
Henry Weston: When you say magical, do you mean special?
Molly Mahoney: Magical.
Henry Weston: What about... really really cool?
Molly Mahoney: Magical.
Eric Applebaum, the Hat Collector: My hat's stuck.
Molly Mahoney: Ha... looks like you're gonna need a ladder.
Eric Applebaum, the Hat Collector: Naah. I just need to jump higher.
Molly Mahoney: Eric... that's seven feet, at least.
Eric Applebaum, the Hat Collector: Seven feet? Really?
Molly Mahoney: At least.
Eric Applebaum, the Hat Collector: You think I should get a running start?
Molly Mahoney: You're here?
Henry Weston: Apparently.
Molly Mahoney: But not actually?
Mr. Edward Magorium: Mortamer fetch.
Mr. Edward Magorium: Stupid zebra.
Henry Weston: How can a store throw a temper tantrum?
Mr. Edward Magorium: It's a magical toystore, it can do all sorts of things.
Henry Weston: You know, some people... send flowers, or cards, or... give people hugs. I... make sure their paper work's all in order. I thought I'd try something different.
Mr. Edward Magorium: I've hired an accountant.
Molly Mahoney: A what?
Mr. Edward Magorium: An accountant. According to the word, it must be a cross between a counter and a mutant and that may be precisely what we need.
Molly Mahoney: Mr. Magorian, I asked the big book for a lollipop and I got a lemur.
Mr. Edward Magorium: A lemur? We don't even carry lemurs! I'm not even sure I know what a lemur is! Wait, is that that small primate-looking thing?
