Odd Thomas: Have I ever told you you've got a lot of issues?
Stormy Llewellyn: I'm a woman. We all have issues. It's what keeps us interesting and you men interested.
Odd Thomas: Oh, yeah. It's what keeps us crazy and die younger.
Stormy Llewellyn: Do you love me?
Odd Thomas: I love you more than life itself.
Stormy Llewellyn: See? It's working.
Odd Thomas: A part of me knew, from the moment I saw her behind the ice cream counter, but the truth hurt too much to accept. Her death would have been one wound too many that day, and I think I would have let go of this life.
Odd Thomas: There's something about a dead man trying to get a laugh that just bugs me. Perhaps because it suggests that, even in death, we still have a pathetic need to be liked - as well as the ever-present ability to humiliate ourselves.
Odd Thomas: I am not afraid of Death. Course, I'm not ready to go on a date with him, either.
Odd Thomas: Fate is not a straight road. There are many forks in it. You have the free will to choose which one you take, but sometimes it will bend around and bring you straight back to that same stubborn fate.
Chief Wyatt Porter: I can't hold him.
Odd Thomas: All right, well, you do agree that he's strange and suspicious, right?
Chief Wyatt Porter: If strange and suspicious were enough to put someone in jail, you'd already be there.
Harlo Landerson: Whoa! Hey, hey. Come on, man. No touchy, no feely. Sorry, but I love this car.
Odd Thomas: I know. It's too bad a car can't love you back.
Officer Simon Varner: Now, Officer Eckles, does being a police officer give you the right to beat the shit out of people?
Officer Bern Eckles: Not at all, Officer Varner, but it is one of the perks of the job.