Greg: The idea behind each one was we took a film that we like and made the title stupider. And then made a new film to reflect the new stupid title. It's a formula that only produces horrible films, but for some reason we kept using it.
Denise: I was a good mom to her, you know? Some single moms their kids grow up too fast, but I always tried to protect Rachel from that. I did my very best to protect her from growing up too quickly, you know?"
Limo Driver: So you love this girl?
Greg: Uh, no. I wouldn't go that far.
Greg: I remember visiting Rachel too. Sometimes she talked, and sometimes she didn't want to. When she didn't want to I talked. Or we watched movies. Sometimes she laughed, sometimes she didn't.
Greg: Can I put some flowers on you?
Greg: So again, if this was a touching, romantic story we'd obviously fall in love and she'd say all the wise, beautiful things that can only be learned in life's twilight or whatever. And then she'd die in my arms. But again, that's not what happened. She just got quieter and unhappier.
Greg: Summer. What does that word even mean, right? More "summ." Winter, same deal. More "wint"?
Rachel: I'm ugly, Greg! Everyone feels like they have to lie to me and no-one realises how insulting that is. Everyone thinks they're helping, and they're not."
Earl: You gonna take her out for Ice Cream. And you gonna take me too, cause I love that shit.
Greg: You know I'm terminally awkward and I have a face like a little groundhog. I just feel like, you know, for a kid like me in high school best case scenario, just survive. You know? Survive without creating any mortal enemies or hideously embarassing yourself forever.
Earl: Dude, where you at? Imma gonna eat your squid.
Earl: You gonna play with them titties?
Earl: Like you care so much about what other people think, boy, you go around here kissing everybody's ass pretending like they're your friend. Look, nobody gives a shit about you, Greg! All right? Nobody gives a shit.
Earl: He hates calling people his friends. Dude's got issues.
Greg: One last thing. Hot girls destroy your life. That's just a fact.
