Bernard: Curtis, you're 900 years old. Grow up.
Mr. Jones: I look better than you.
Uncle Elroy: You don't.
Mr. Jones: I cook better than you.
Uncle Elroy: You can't.
Mr. Jones: My dick is bigger than yours.
Uncle Elroy: It was cold that night.
Rachel Bitterman: "Working for a dream." That's beautiful. You know, my employees work for salaries.
Marv Merchants: Well, prison isn't so bad. We do get salisbury steak on Wednesdays.