Gator: Hey Taffy, baby, come suck your daddy's dick.
Taffy: I wouldn't suck your lousy dick if I was suffocating and there was oxygen in your balls.
Barb: I think the little buggers schnockered, son of a bitch.
Drayton: Look... I got some good barbecue here.
Beef: Oh, I knew I shouldn't be screwing around with the dead man's music. This place is possessed.
Arnold Philbin: What are you talking about?
Beef: You trying to tell me you didn't hear that shriek? That was something trying to get out of its premature grave, and I don't want to be here when it does.
Arnold Philbin: Opening night prima donnas. Look, iron man. If you so uptight, take a shower and cool off.
Beef: My pleasure... bones.
Ma Cobb: Remember what I've always told you: The wages of sin is gonorrhea, syphilis, and death.
Ruth: Harvey, I have a headache, a toothache, a backache and I'm expecting the gout.
Harvey Beckman: Would an aspirin help?
Dr. Ernest D. Hubbs: You did your major work applying game theory to the language of killer whales.
James R. Lesko: Well, it seemed cheaper than applying it to roulette.
Dr. Ernest D. Hubbs: Did you actually succeed in making positive contact with the whales?
James R. Lesko: Only with the emotionally disturbed.
Dr. Ernest D. Hubbs: How were you able to determine that?
James R. Lesko: We talked.