Buster Scruggs: Misanthrope? I don't hate my fellow man, even when he's tiresome and surly and tries to cheat at poker. I figure that's just a human material, and him that finds in it cause for anger and dismay is just a fool for expecting better.
Father Burke: The blood of Jesus Christ.
Frenchie: Holy shit!
Father Burke: The holiest.
Dr. Grace Hart: Shall we begin the autopsy? Dr. Grace Hart.
Watson: A woman doctor?
Holmes: Impossible. Fortunately we have a real doctor here.
Watson: Would you like some heroin?
Lonnie Laloush: Walk faster Finger Blaster.
Dominika Egorova: You sent me to whore school.
[Tyler enters the room and sees a woman bound and gagged on the floor, making mumbled screams].
Don: Bud, listen to me. I'd never hurt anyone. This woman and I are having an affair. We're a little kinky, that's all. I know, I know, this is a lot for you to take in, but your mother knows all about this. She and I-
Kassi: Are you serious with this bullshit? (01:33:30)
Kiyoshi: He's all bloody. Did you kill him?
Nick Lowell: He'll live.
Michael MacCauley: What happens when you find 'em?
Joanna: They die. Hypothetically.
Joan: You didn't kill her, Annie.
Annie: What?
Joan: She isn't gone. (01:08:10)
Daphne Blake: Velma, the tube just ate her! The tube ate Mikayla!
Velma Dinkley: Okay, I'm...pretty sure it's just a secret elevator or something.
Daphne Blake: Okay, right, right. (00:53:25)
Curtis Farraday: You know you can get AIDS from looking through trash, right?
Tommy 'Eats' Eaton: Only way you're ever getting AIDS.
Malloy: Take this little problem here on your board. The answer seems pretty plain to me.
Evan Birch: Does it? Well, be my guest. Prove this chair exists.
Malloy: What chair?
Tam: Logic doesn't apply to any of this.
Sean: She's an enigma my wife. You can get close to her, but you never quite reach her. She's like a, beautiful ghost.
Boyce: Three months ago, I was cutting grass on my front yard. The mailman shows up with a letter from the army. Now I'm here, and no idea where I'm going to end up.