Tuptim: If love were a choice, who would choose such exquisite pain?
Archie Gates: You're scared, right?
Conrad Vig: Maybe.
Archie Gates: The way it works is, you do the thing you're scared shitless of, and you get the courage after you do it, not before you do it.
Conrad Vig: That's a dumbass way to work. It should be the other way around.
Archie Gates: I know. That's the way it works.
Joan of Arc: I don't think. I leave that to God. I'm just a Messenger in all of this.
Eddie: You have the American dream! The American dream is to be born in the gutter and have nothing. Then to raise up and have all the money in the world, and stick it in your ears and go plbtlbtlbltlbtlblt! That's a pretty good dream.
Gustave: I'll never forgive you, you know.
Valerie: For what?
Gustave: For marrying him instead of me.