Best comedy movie quotes of 1971

Willy Wonka: Charlie, don't forget what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he always wanted.
Charlie Bucket: What happened?
Willy Wonka: He lived happily ever after.

Oscy: Not even the best of friends go halfsies on a rubber.

Bobbie: I need a life.
Jonathan: Get a job.
Bobbie: I don't want a job. I want you.
Jonathan: I'm taken, by me. Get out of the house, do something useful, Goddammit.

Fielding Mellish: Blood! That should be on the inside.

Captain Mainwaring: I intend to mould those men out there into an aggressive fighting force. I'm not going to get very far if you keep inviting them to "step this way."

Neil Jones

Maude: That was fun! Let's play something together.
Harold: I don't play anything.
Maude: Nothing? Dear me, everybody should be able to make some music. That's the cosmic dance.

Sid: How about some food?
Beattie: Well I could make you some beans on toast or something?
Sid: No, nothing too elaborate, thank you.

Dr. Anton Phibes: Where can we find two better hemispheres, without sharp north, without declining west? My face in thine eye, thine in mine appears, and true plain hearts do in thee faces rest. Within twenty-four hours, my work will be finished, and then, my precious jewel, I will join you in your setting. We shall be reunited forever in a secluded corner of the great elysian field of the beautiful beyond.

Cardinal Wolsey: A drink, Ma'am?
Queen Marie: Thank you.
Cardinal Wolsey: I can heartily recommend the porter here.
Queen Marie: Really? Then do send him up to my room later.

The Kid: America, man! You know, it's so beautiful I wanta eat it.

Tommy: You know the double-trip maxie ford with the knickerbocker break.

Latigo: This your office?
Doc Schultz: I doctor pack mules, too. If you got a pain in the ass, you come see Doc Schultz.