James Pepper: You know, there's an old saying, Miss Sally. There's no law west of Dodge and no God west of the Pecos. Right, Mr. Chisum?
John Simpson Chisum: Wrong, Mr. Pepper. Because no matter where people go, sooner or later there's the law. And sooner or later they find God's already been there.
Dr. Jones: Mr, UH?
Cord McNally: Doesn't matter.
Dr. Jones: Well, Mr Doesn't matter we ought to give them one last good yell, they usually yell a lot when I give them a shot of this.
Cord McNally: YOW! That's the real stuff.
Dr. Jones: Well, if you had been a good enough actor I wouldn't have used it.
Cord McNally: Cord McNally.
John O'Hanlan: Well, how much money does he need to get her liver fixed?
Jenny: Five hundred dollars.
John O'Hanlan: Five hundred dollars for a liver?
Jenny: That's what the big doctor in Chicago charges. And he's got all kinds of fancy letters in back of his name.
John O'Hanlan: I don't care what's in back of his name! Five hundred dollars - that's more than you have to pay for a good horse.
Old Lodge Skins: Don't worry my son, you will be back with us, I dreamed it last night. I saw you with your wives.
Jack Crabb: Wives, Grandfather?
Old Lodge Skins: Yes, there were three... or four, it was hard to tell. It was very dark in your teepee and they were under buffalo rugs as you crawled among them. Anyway, it was a great copulation.
John Morgan: It just occurred to me... I've traveled halfway around the world, at great expense, simply to kill a different kind of bird.
Woodward Lopeman: Why do you work at it so hard proving you're a son-of-a-bitch.
Paris Pittman Jr.: Because I am. It's my profession and I'm on top.