Rusty Ryan: Are you all right?
Danny Ocean: Yeah, um, I just bit into a red pepper.
Rusty Ryan: Is that... Are you... Are you watching Oprah?
Lenny: You may find this hard to believe, but most of the guys here don't have a lot of experience with girls.
Dewey Cox: Edith, I am starting to think... that maybe you don't believe in me.
Edith: I do believe in you. I just know you're gonna fail.
Nick Persons: You're the local real estate guy.
Chuck Mitchell, Jr.: I'm also the local contractor.
God: Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?
Annie Braddock: There's a common belief among anthropologists that you must immerse yourself in an unfamiliar world in order to truly understand your own.
Brendan: Why are your eyes so red?
Francis: Why is your head so bald?
Michelangelo: Dudes, did anyone get the license plate number of that thing that hit us last night? Man, my head.
Donatello: Okay, that was just weird, first the Foot, then that hideous monster,.
Michelangelo: Yeah, it looked like your mom, dude.
Donatello: Yeah, that would make her your mom too, dufus.
Michelangelo: Whatever.
Rod Kimble: Have fun being married to satan.
Ivan "Fire Urchin": Stepped on me, stepped on me? Are you kidding? This guy was dancing on me! I mean just look at this, broken, broken, gone, gone, broken, broken, broken.
Melanie 'Mel' Whitfield: So, technically, you slept with Santa?
Kelli Whitfield: Well, I didn't know he was Santa at the time... but technically, I guess I did.
Melanie 'Mel' Whitfield: Well, ho, ho, ho.
Trudie: There may not be such a thing as a perfect job, a perfect life or a perfect family, but there is such a thing as a perfect moment. So I take back what I said. Doing one crazy thing probably does make you crazy, but it also can make you happy.
Kate: I wish there was a cookbook for life, you know? Recipes telling us exactly what to do. I know, I know, you're gonna say "How else will you learn, Kate."
Therapist: Mm. No, actually I wasn't going to say that. You want to guess again?
Kate: No, no, go ahead.
Therapist: Well what I was going to say was, you know better than anyone, it's the recipes that you create yourself that are the best.
Professor Farnsworth: Time travel is impossible!
Fry: But Professor, you time traveled yourself. Remember? When we went back to Roswell?
Professor Farnsworth: That proves nothing! And furthermore, you'd think I could remember a thing like that! Plus, who are you anyway?
Peggy: It's nice to have a word that can describe you. I've never had that before.
Edward Cole: As something of an expert in diseases, I believe more people die from visitors than diseases.