Best comedy movie quotes of all time

Aubrey: What's your name?
Fat Amy: Fat Amy.
Aubrey: You call yourself Fat Amy?
Fat Amy: Yeah, so twig bitches like you don't do it behind my back.

Marvin: If there's one thing I know, it's women and covert operations.
Frank: Marvin, that's two things.
Han Cho Bai: No, grasshopper. It is not.

Jonah Hill: Dear God, it's me, Jonah Hill... From Moneyball.

Puss in Boots: Feed me, if you dare.

Pedro: Do you think people will vote for me?
Napoleon Dynamite: Heck yes! I'd vote for you.
Pedro: Like what are my skills?
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, you have a sweet bike. And you're really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you're like the only guy at school who has a mustache.

Buck: What time do you want me to pick you up after school?
Tia: Don't bother! I'll get a ride with friends.
Buck: No, I have my orders. What time?
Tia: Are you really this stupid? I said I would get a ride. I always get a ride.
Buck: Hey, I'll just call the school, find out what time, and meet you right here.
Tia: Go ahead, call the school. I won't be here.
Buck: Stand me up today, and tomorrow I'll drive you to school in my robe and pajamas and WALK you to your first class. 4:00 okay?

Ginny: I really love Rudy. He is totally enamored of me. I mean, I've had men who've loved me before, but not for six months in a row.

Young C.C.: Iris Myandowski is a hand-walking queer.

Commissioner Brumford: [On phone.] Hello? He did what? How many animals escaped? Oh, my god.
Frank: Hello, Commissioner. You're looking lovely this evening.
Commissioner Brumford: Do you realize that because of you this city is being overrun by baboons?
Frank: Well, isn't that the fault of the voters?

Hogan: Sister if you wanna bless em you bless em dry.

Doc McGhee: I have managed the Scorpions, Bon Jovi, Skid Row, kiss. I had been dragged through the deepest shit with all kinds of mentally ill people. But I have never been through what Mötley Crüe put me through.

Rooster: The sun came up again? I can't believe it! I thought when I closed my eyes last night, that that was it! But we have another day of this.

Ssiscool ★

Frank: A mental mind fuck can be nice.

Frank Drebin: Hey, Rocco. Who's the old bag? She take one in the face?
Rocco: She's my mother.
Frank Drebin: Oh. Mrs. Dillon, your son is a ruthless, sadistic, cold-blooded animal. You must be very proud of him.
Mrs. Dillon: I am.

Wyldstyle: You are not our leader.
Batman: How many movies are made about you? None. I have nine movies, and three more currently in development.

Principal Jane Masterson: You can plunder my dungeon anytime.
Ned Gold: I'll bring my longbow.

Pete: It's four in the fucking morning!
Shaun: It's Saturday!
Pete: No, it's not. It's fucking Sunday. And I've got to go to fucking work in four fucking hours 'cos every other fucker in my fucking department is fucking ill! Now can you see why I'm SO FUCKING ANGRY?!
Ed: Fuck, yeah!

Col. John 'Hannibal' Smith: Overkill is underrated.

Barry B. Benson: Ya like jazz?

Stig: Just because you put your finger in your belly button and brown shit comes out don't mean it's your asshole.