Simon: I said, what does coffee and donuts have to do with God?
Rev. Russell: They're merely refreshments so people can socialize and talk about up coming events.
Simon: Who ever said church needs a continental breakfast?
Joe: Hey, your son is not a screw up, he's a hero.
Mr. Birch: What?
Joe: I said he's a hero. And you don't deserve him. I want you to know that.
Simon: I've been thinking.
Joe: Yeah?
Simon: Last year we were in the squirt league, and this year we're in the pewee.
Joe: So?
Simon: So what do they want us to do, play baseball or urinate? Anyway, I was just thinking.
Joe: I have faith. I just need proof to back it up.
Simon: What I want to do and what I do are two separate things. If we all went around doing what we wanted all the time, there'd be chaos.
Simon: I don't see how pork chops could lead to intercourse, no matter how good they are.
Miss Leavy: The Star of Bethlehem is not a piñata.
Joe: My balls just turned to prunes.
Simon: My balls just turned to raisins.
Simon: She's so sexy that sometimes I forget she's someone's mother.
Joe: Well, what if I said the same thing about your mother?
Simon: I'd have you committed.
Simon: You're already a bastard. Might as well be an enlightened one.
Simon: Boobs.
Simon: Your mother is so sexy, sometimes I forget she's someone's mother.
Joe: What if I said the same thing about your mother?
Simon: I'd have you committed.
Rev. Russell: What are you doing sitting in a corner Simon?
Simon: Thinking about God.
Rev. Russell: In a corner?
Simon: Faith is not in a floor plan.
Answer: I don't know if it was ever stated what Simon died of, but Simon - against the odds - lived much longer than the doctor thought he would. Simon continued to "outgrow his body" (internal organs became too large for his tiny body). It can be assumed that Simon contracted pneumonia or hypothermia from being in the frigid water when he rescued the children from the submerged bus. I think Simon - expected to die at a very young age - was staying alive until he could realise his purpose or "God's Plan" for him. To "believers", Simon was "made small" and practiced holding his breath underwater (seemingly for no apparent reason) so that he'd be able to save the kids on the bus... then, having fulfilled "his purpose", was called "home."
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