Adrian Monk: Unless I'm wrong, which, you know, I'm not.
Elaine "The Pain" Boyack: I'm very good with children, it's just, just that Tracy Beaker's not very good at being a child.
Lt. Horatio Caine: You're evil, you enjoy death, and I hope you enjoy your own.
DCS Christopher Foyle: The uniform suits you.
Andrew Foyle: Thanks. I wish I could say the same about your dressing gown.
Ruth Evershed: Shall I hit him again Adam?
Adam Carter: Only if you want to.
Allison Clarke: Even when we know we'll never find the answers, we have to keep on asking questions.
Big Dee Dee Thorne: Well, since no-one has offered to buy me a drink, I guess I'll buy my own. Now I know how Phyllis feels.
Dr. Andrew Brown: So how's the Amy situation working out?
Ephram: What Amy situation?
Dr. Andrew Brown: Ohh... that good huh?
Ephram: Oh it's fantastic. I'm a really important friend.
Jack Malone: According to the groom, she was an angel.
Martin: I guess love is blind. And deaf. And very, very dumb.
Jack Malone: Spoken like a true romantic.
Naruto Uzumaki: Believe it.
Permanent Record customer: Where can I find Duran Duran?
Margaret: K-Mart.
Vic Mackey: Ay, Mo. Your sister's ass really tastes as sweet as Alvarez here says it does? He wants to know what your momma's putting in the corn muffin.
Jack Hudson: Yes Miles, if you're right, you can say you told me so. And I know you will in that special way that makes us all love you so.
Vic: George, I'd like to congratulate you.
George: We don't know yet if my mom is going to jail.
Vic: I meant your daughter going to college.
Loca: Well, let's see. You have three options. Either you do it, you do it, or you do it.
Aurelia: If you marry Cinna's daughter you will be identified with the popular party whether you wish or not.
Caesar: I wish it.
Aurelia: They are not our people.
Cousin: You wish to join with farmers and hagglers and beggars?
Caesar: Our family itself did not exactly drop straight out of Jupiter's ass.
James: Why would Jeremy think you could make a limo out of a Fiat Panda? You could strech it a mile and it would only be as long as n a normal car.
Richard: Have you met Jeremy Clarkson? Tall man, curly hair, idiot?
Cindy: Origami - the ancient art of Japanese paper folding. I will be making the most difficult of all origami sculptures - a snow monkey...
Jimmy: Actually, paper folding originated in China...
Cindy: ...riding a flying dragon...
Jimmy: ...in the second century CE...
Cindy: ...while drinking tea...
Jimmy: ...and was brought to Japan...
Cindy: ...on a ladder...
Jimmy: ...in the sixth century!
Cindy: ...in December!
Miss Fowl: Cindy, I didn't know you and Jimmy were doing your report together!